A while ago, I wrote this article for another website, but seeing as how it is still relevant today and I still have the same feelings on the subject, I decided to add it to the roster of posts here at FWF, for completeness' sake, though it's not exactly the same. I've done some tweaking...
I'm sure there are a whole slew of other horror fans who are in the same boat as I am. So what IS it like to live with someone whose life does not revolve around horror?
I started dating my hubby nearly twenty-seven years ago –
longer than a lot of you have even been alive. So what was popular in
horror back in 1986? Well, the good ones were films like
Aliens, The Fly, Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer, The Hitcher, even
April Fool's Day. Nothing really earth-shattering though. But the bad? They were pretty damn bad. Like
Sorority House Massacre, Poltergeist II, Spookies, Maximum Overdrive, and
Vamp, among others.
Meh.
So instead of introducing him to my favorite genre in the
way I could have, we were stuck seeing things like
Platoon, Top Gun, Cobra, and
Heartbreak Ridge. (Not that those are bad films, far from it. Just not horror.)
So when he finally found out about the
major degree of my horror obsession, it was too late. I’d already
reeled him in. Not that he doesn’t appreciate horror. He’s just very
much an action kind of guy. Even though I try to explain how much
action is truly in horror, he just wasn’t born to be a true horror fan.
Basically,
he would never say he dislikes horror, and will often go with me to see
the latest genre film. He sat through
Daybreakers and
The Wolfman with
me, but didn’t go see
Let Me In or
Sinister. In that respect, he chose poorly.
His
issues are random. He hates anything black & white. Out goes
Carnival of Souls, The Phantom of the Opera, and one of my most favorite
films,
Psycho. (Though he’s had to sit through
Psycho and deal with it
too many times to count. He actually has an appreciation for that one now!) This is a guy who finally watched
It’s A Wonderful Life for the
first time a few years ago, having always avoided it due to its
monochrome. Yeah, I know…
But he still gives me one of those heavy sighs or a big ‘tsk! when I slide
Night of the Living Dead into the DVD player. (Even though he's watched it countless times and has even taken me to the actual NOTLD cemetery.)
He
hates foreign films, claiming he cannot tolerate subtitled movies.
Personally I think that is because he doesn’t want to read while
watching the action on screen, or perhaps he has ADD and can’t do two
things at once. It could be either.
Another gripe with foreign
films for him is the plot. Some of that may be due to, in various
films, the fact that they are subtitled or speaking in another
language. But let’s face it, neither Fulci or Argento make for great
narratives and while they may look pretty (particularly in Argento’s
case), they don’t always make a whole lot of sense. So scratch
Suspiria, Deep Red, The Beyond, and House by the Cemetery.
Matter
of fact the first time he came home and I was watching
The Beyond, I do
believe he was so appalled at the poor quality of the film as well as
the completely pointless plot that he just turned and walked out without
saying a word.
He has in fact, watched
Tenebrae though, and states it’s a “mostly tolerable” film (!)
So,
moving on from Italian horror, we attack the French. Not literally,
but that might be nice, right? Anyway. The hubby can get down with the
French. Mostly. Well, not really…
But while watching these
films, he doesn’t really want to have to pay attention to the
questionable plots, he’d rather just watch the violence. As in
High
Tension. Or
Frontier(s). But when he watched
Irreversible he couldn’t
stand the fact that it started from the end and worked towards the
beginning. He just despises that technique and is verbal about telling
me so.
As for other foreign films, he sees no point in
Asian films, as most of the so-called J-Horror has been remade as
American films, which he will always prefer. (Yeah, he’s one of those
types.) Didn’t even want to think about watching
[.Rec] - he’d already
seen
Quarantine. Yikes. He didn’t mind the Norwegian slasher film
Cold
Prey too much, which is indeed a shocker. But suffice it to say, if I’m putting on
something with subtitles, he’s outta here.
For this reason, he has
yet to see the fabulous
Let the Right One In. (But he's seen and enjoyed
Let Me In on DVD. He just doesn't understand that it comes from a superior foreign edition.)
Gore.
Yeah, he likes it well enough. But I like it more. I think it has to
again do with the sub-par plot lines of many of the most gruesome
flicks. He did like
Hostel. But what wasn’t to like? Naked girls and
lots of blood. Ditto that with
Hostel II. So I guess you could say
he’s a fan of Eli Roth, if pressed.
But something like
Dead Alive or even
Martyrs? Nah.
Martyrs is a double whammy cause you’re adding in the foreign aspect.
Classic
horror? I’m sorry (and ashamed, for him) to announce he just doesn’t
get it. At all. No doubt he’s seen most of the Universal pictures, I
have most. But again, when you combine the black and whiteness with
the quality that was available back in the 30’s and 40’s, and he is one
disapproving dude. He does NOT want to watch Browning’s
Dracula ever
again. Give him
Bram Stoker’s Dracula, sure. But not something from
1931!!
I have a special place in my heart for those films, but I watch them alone.
Same
goes for Hammer horror. He saw most of them back when he was a kid but
laughs, no – cackles, hysterically at them now. I guess he just thinks
they are pretty hokey. And they are. But again, they’re awesome,
right?
And can we just forget
Godzilla and everything associated
with it? I own the original
Gojira, and when I watched it once when he
was home, he sang the theme music out loud for three days in a mocking
tone.
He's not completely irredeemable. He does like (maybe even love) a good ghost story. He is a
big fan
of
The Changeling (thank God), loves
The Shining, enjoys
Ghost Story and
The Woman in Black (either version),
was shocked by
The Sixth Sense’s ending (like everyone else), and
tolerates
Haunted due to Kate Beckinsale’s nudity. Of course.
I’d
have to say his favorite horror films are a lot like the films anyone
else without an obsession or great knowledge of horror would be.
Halloween, The Exorcist, and
Jaws. In other words, nothing off
the wall or eccentric.
He does, however, have a great love of all
things Jamie Lee Curtis – so movies like
The Fog and
Prom Night are
always welcome on our flat screen.
We do agree on a few things. The never-ending remakes are getting out of hand, 3D has worn out its welcome, hand-held camera flicks are nauseating, and most CGI is an overrated, obnoxious mess. Oh! And we both love Kurt Russell.
All of that being
said, how do I live with someone who isn’t as into horror as I am? I
mean, I most often live and breathe horror. I spend hours on my laptop
writing about it when I’m not watching it. It can be really difficult
for me to deal with the fact that even though I have an entire library
of horror to choose from at any given moment, I may not be able to watch
what I want when I want. I can kind of understand, as if it were up
to me, I’d watch nothing but horror. And then where would I be?
Without great flicks like
When Harry Met Sally, Rocky, Gladiator, Braveheart, Grease, Forrest Gump, The
Breakfast Club, Sideways, and
The Godfather films– all of which both of us
love.
So we have to have some conditions.
*I cannot rent exclusively horror from
NETFLIX. If he wants to see the latest
Expendables or
Transporter movie, what can I say?
*I
don’t generally watch two horror movies back to back, unless he's asleep, isn’t
home, or it’s October – all bets are off in the tenth month and he knows
it.
*I don’t ramble on about horror to him 24/7, although I most certainly could.
*I
try to appreciate things like Bruce Lee marathons, movies about
gladiators, and dumb-ass inane comedies. Though I draw the line at anything
with Chris Farley in it. Just no.
* I have to forgo horror some nights to let him watch
American Pickers, Pawn Stars, or any random VH1 show about the greatest hits of the 70's.
*And I promise not to spend all my time online, though sometimes that seems difficult.
He’s
actually more than tolerant with my obsession. He reads my blog and
tells me mine is better than anyone else’s (of course he’s not only
required to say that but to be honest he doesn’t read anyone’s but
mine). He understands my sincere and undying devotion of all things
Norman Bates, and appreciates
Jaws (almost) as much as I do. He even
helps me decorate for Halloween, and always is the official carver of
the seasonal Jack-o-lantern.
He’s forgiving of my
fixation with horror. He
gets me, and for that I’m thankful. He sits
through (and falls asleep through) a whole big heaping pile of horror.
Even enjoys some of it.
Often he knows I’m itching to re-watch
Argento’s
Opera and so he’ll retreat to the den to peruse eBay for a
couple hours. God, he’s tolerant.
So what I guess I’m
saying is that I’m lucky. I’ve got a guy who is able to deal with me
watching all the horror I can get my hands on. He doesn’t make me turn
it off, he accepts that I cannot stop adding to my ridiculously large DVD collection. He
even endures listening to the over-abundance of horror movie scores I’ve
accumulated. And he’s proud of my writing – not only for my blog, but all the other places I turn up.
But if I'm being honest, what
I’d really love to be saying is that my hubby loves to sit down with a
glass of the red stuff and have a marathon of
Evil Dead, Zombi 2,
Friday the 13th,
Profondo Rosso, and the 1977 version of
Piranha, you know?
But hey,
marriage isn’t perfect – I’ll take what I can get :)